Drunken Messaging... Hysterical or Shameful, You Decide!

As I continue to “blog” I have mixed feelings. One is fear. I spoke with a fellow classmate of mine recently who has attended very few classes all semester. I informed him that procrastination was at an all time high and that I had in fact, started a blog. His response, “Wow, you have reached new heights.” Usually I sew instead of study and make myself a kick ass wardrobe. Now, apparently as an alternative for of procrastination I have begun an online journal of sorts when I should be learning property law. Needless to say, he’s right and I should be studying and fearful that I will fail. I think the imminent fright he instilled was largely a result of the fact that if someone who had barely gone to school all semester thought I should be worried, then perhaps I should be worried. On the other hand, I continue to write this. I do feel it is somewhat productive, although I am still on the fence about whether it is more or less so than sewing.

I recently had a conversation on myspace messaging which I found particularly humorous and decided to share. Names have been changed to protect the innocent (or not so innocent as the case may be).

This morning I woke up to this message:

its a 4:30 in the morning. Im a little drunk (applause)<------ theres a narrations for ya. I got two numbers but I think thayll be worthless (applause followed by gasps). on chick has a kid....what am i gonna do with her? i am a kid....i dont want nothere one aroudn (laughter and a man coughing). the other one wnet to my high school and was a grade under my sister .... i think i might getr on her just fro the principle of it. ...so i can say i got on someone a gradde under my sister (chuckles and one boo). shes cute but not a lot ofs chest. ne ways...your a weirdo...(knods of agreement and one laugh) i gots me drunk on a coupld vodka Tonicos. its the best drink....the drink of professionals (people in suits stand up and cheers me) ok...i can narrate !! cause im a badd muda fucker...when i t comes to narration....( no one does anything and i smack someone in the face in the front row) damnb hecklers....

My response:Just so you are aware, in all seriousness, I am going to take you response, change the names to protect the innocent and comment on it as a blog entry. This is precisely the kind of material I have been looking for. Be afraid be very afraid. In other news, you should check out my first entry. It is posted on my other myspace page which shouldn't be hard to find because it's your other friend... no your other friend. Haha, later!

Ackmed’s response:Hey thats cool, Id be honored if you took the message I wrote in an intoxicated, drunkin stupor and in which i berated two women, a mother and and old classmate, and labeled them as worthless. Just make sure you leave my name off lol. I read your blog. I liked it. i kind of want to blog also. But i know i will have to comment on yours...so instead of doing double work, my blogs are just going to be my comments to your bogging. I think thats more efficient for everyone lol. Also i am taking your internal narrations bit, im hooked. Lastly, how long you think you can ride the friend comment jokes :) they are well placed though, and they do bring a smile to my face. but its inevitable to run out. Have a good day!

My Response:
Frankly Ackmed, I plan to make the friends comment joke until you have some friends. I suggest you get on that. Frankly it can't get old until "the chuckles all around" cease. Since in reality (I know this may come as a shock) I am the only chuckler, as long as I find it funny (which I don't see ending any time soon), it won't be old. Furthermore, I was not intending to paint your drunken banter in such bad light. Frankly, I hadn't interpreted it as such. But, clearly I overestimated your character. No wonder you don't have any friends! Hahaha! I'll have to re-consider whether we should be friends!

A few things are clear from this. One is that I clearly employ the word "frankly" too frequently in casual message exchanges. Another is that sharing this exchange with whoever chooses to read it is not only a waste of my time, but likely a large waste of yours as well. One can only hope you're in my property class and I have just thrown the curve in my favor by distracting you from studying. But, frankly, I doubt that to be the case. And, lastly, Ackmed would clearly be a great name for a friend who sends ridiculous messages at 4:30 in the a.m. about women he met at the bar and dubbed as "worthless" for no good reason.